Let’s Pause For a Moment
Reflection, horoscopes, and deep breaths
“Maybe you need to slow down a little.”
It’s a phrase I’ve heard a lot from people. Maybe it came up when I mentioned trying to balance my job and freelance schedule. Perhaps it was in response to every day of my October being booked out for Halloween fun. Or sometimes it came out of nowhere, provoked by nothing other than what I assume were the bags under my eyes and the hint of panic in my voice; the same sound I imagine that dog in the meme makes, the one who is sitting in the room that’s on fire.
The holidays are always particularly busy for me. Between the fun things to do and the gift preparations, I meet myself coming and going. And then suddenly it’s January, and I’m mourning how I spent too much time ticking things off a list rather than staying in the moment. Or worse, I start thinking about how the year went and feel disappointed in myself.
2024 has had its positive moments. I travelled to eight states and six countries between work and pleasure, attended concerts for iconic musicians, saw sports games, took cocktail making classes, and fell asleep on sunny beaches. I enrolled in the Writers Institute to recommit to my craft (same story with this newsletter). I continued Wine and Pine. I bought cool clothes and ate good food and on rare occasions slept past 7:30 in the morning. A lot of great stuff happened. But, as a pessimist, I often set that aside for the negative; for everything I didn’t accomplish, the ways in which I fell short.
This list is endless: failing to finish my novel draft, forgetting too often to brush my teeth before bed, never going longer than a month without tears. I won’t bore you with the details. The only reason it’s even relevant is because after I wallow in my shortcomings, I eventually ask myself the most important question: what could I do better? And more so than other years, the upcoming new one is presenting ways to possibly implement serious change.
Come 2025, I’ll be staring down the barrel of some intense questions. Do I want to stay at my job? Do I want to stay in New York? Do I want to truly dedicate myself to my craft and writing before giving up to become, I don’t know, an accountant?
They aren’t the kind of things a person can think about during the most wonderful (read: swamped) time, though that hasn’t stopped me from trying. My friends have endured a flurry of anxious text messages or a cocktail-fueled conversation about my future in the past month. I’ve pondered taking the well-traversed safe route as I have done throughout my twenties. I’ve considered throwing caution to the wind and leaning in the direction of newness despite the fear. And I’ve heard arguments in favor of both options. Depending on the day, one is more useful than the other. The only definitely unhelpful piece of advice was that ChatGPT is taking over the book world, so I might as well get out of publishing now and become a mom. And not to a dog, to an actual child. At least that made me laugh instead of cry.
Even on difficult days, I’m never usually a spiritual or astrological person. I learned my chart because I went to art school and it was essentially a requirement (for the record: Taurus Sun, Gemini Moon, Virgo Rising). On bad days, I jokingly wonder which planet I can blame for my mishaps. I deleted the Co-Star app because I got sick of it bullying me. Lately, though, I’ve been stopping to read the horoscope section in the backs of women’s magazines or across my Instagram feed, thinking maybe I would see something in it that I’ve never found before. To my surprise, many were uncanny in their accuracy.
I know for the most part that the folks behind astrological tidbits try to make them generic enough so that the masses can mistake the sentiment for applying directly to them, i.e. the Barnum effect. Everyone is having great ideas, or dealing with a misunderstanding, or standing at a crossroads. But some of the ones I stumbled upon felt far more…specific.
During the week my partner was offered an international job, a Cosmopolitan horoscope correctly identified that I was dealing with a big decision in my love life and encouraged me not to rush. A few weeks later, as I struggled through endless tasks at my job, a reading in Glamour told Tauruses to stop using work as a crutch in the face of big choices. And then this week, after surveying everyone in my circle on the matter of Rachel’s life, I saw this little ditty in The Cut.
With this considered, I decided the best course of action for me—at least until the end of 2024—is no action at all. No worries! No decisions! No negative thoughts! Just Christmas TV specials and cookie bakes and loved ones. I’m not going to push myself, and that includes writing this newsletter. I’ll be taking a two-week break from Wednesday woes, returning to your inboxes in January 2025.
I hope the end of the year brings you the reflection you’d like or the horoscope clarity you seek. That you can take a minute of pause, a deep breath in to absorb everything that was the past 365 days. And I hope when you let it out, you find yourself with the slightest smile on your face, a realization that for the bad stuff out there, there’s also usually some good.
Rachel’s Weekly Recs:
Hershey-ets are an M&M-like candy that can be found exclusively during the holiday season. The delightful little chocolates are worth a buy on that last trip to the pharmacy for stocking stuffers. Why not treat yourself this Christmas?
The weather is finally getting frightful (at least in the Northeast), which means you need a good pair of winter boots. I listened to the influencer girlies and picked up the Fur-Lined Doc Martens. Not only are they very stylish, they’re also incredibly warm for trudging through the bad weather.
I saw this sweatshirt from Mûre+Grand at the Union Square Holiday Market and was instantly obsessed, for obvious reasons if you click the link. Get it for your sobby self or another crying cutie in your life. Plus, 10% of proceeds go to supporting folks and their families affected by mental illness.